what if’s

the most common question i’m asked about my profession is “how do you do that?” well my answer has always been easy, i’m passionate about helping the kids and families and i feel that it’s a privilege to walk along side them during such difficult times. it’s the most difficult thing i’ve ever had to do and i do it everyday. i cry with families, i rejoice with families, i go home from work and worry about the kids but i don’t think i could make the same impact i do without being vulnerable to “feel.” after seeing the heartache and unknowns day after day i begin to think i’m crazy for desiring to have children of my own. what if we end up in one of those hospital rooms one day. what if i’m on the other side receiving the terrible diagnosis for my child. what if it’s my baby that’s crying in pain. what if it’s my child being injected with chemotherapy. what if… despite the what if’s my heart longs desperately to be a mom. longs to be able to love and comfort and to protect. longs to be needed…