life
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a better me
i’ve replayed the conversations i have had the most over the past few months and i hear complaining. ugh that is not me! well it’s not who i want to be. i am anxious, high drama, nervous and stressed when things are tough. i have been complaining so much lately about my lack of sleep and worse my parenting #fail for not being able to get rad to sleep for very long at night. woe to me. I’M GOING TO BLINK AND HE WILL BE GROWN UP. why am i not joyfully embracing the moments that stand still in his nursery? why am i not thanking God for the extra…
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fancy yoga pants
i thought i’d have this kid thing down after three years of raising gracie, the most spirited, energetic, independent little being i have ever known. whew! her infancy was exhausting, lots of crying, not much sleeping and more crying. but once we figured out a routine and once she learned how to sleep, she became a happy happy child. she did great with routine so we ran with it and kept her days structured. she’s one of those kids that gets more wound up and energetic the more tired she gets. she’s not one to curl up on the couch and confess that she’s tired. no, instead she’s doing cartwheels…
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end of a chapter…for now
it’s official. i’m pushing pause on my nursing career to stay at home with the kiddos. it’s still surreal to me, this opportunity to stay at home with my babies. the chance to take a breather from a journey that has left so many marks on my soul. to be honest, i am grieving the loss of that identity, the pride that comes with the work i’ve done for so long but i am empty… i am drained from caring for my own family especially since the arrival of rad that i can’t imagine finding the strength to care for those kiddos at the hospital right now like i used…
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writing my story
i’ve had the opportunity to read a few books (pictured below) this summer, something i usually don’t enjoy that much but for some reason, i think god was tugging on my heart to slow down and read. these books have been a complete blessing. they have opened my eyes to how our ordinary can be extraordinary. how my daily steps are writing MY story and it’s an incredible privilege to honor god with every step. these books have sparked a passion in me for writing. i do feel convicted a bit that i chose these books over diving into god’s word on most days but they have inspired and urged…
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my new best friend, joy, and other stuff
i read this really great book over the weekend by melanie shankle called sparkly green earrings. it’s a memoir by a down to earth, honest, hilarious momma. i loved it. i finished it in two days. that is quite a feat for me as i don’t ever read. i think i was scarred as a child because i struggled with reading comprehension so much and if it weren’t for the patience and expertise of my amazing mother (who just so happened to be a reading recovery teacher), i don’t think i would have ever recovered 🙂 this book was easy to read and i felt as though melanie took my…
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what we’re up to
summer is in full swing and here’s what’s been keeping us busy: anything involving water and goggles! lots of snow cones: getting a big girl bed: spending time with her new cousin: AND….getting ready for BABY BROTHER’S arrival in september with lots of craft projects! (art collaboration by gracie and dad) (whale pillow by mom)
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band of brothers and sisters
i read an article that was floating around on facebook the other day that resonated deeply. it was written by a local pasor, will davis jr, and the quotes in this post are from his article found here: http://www.willdavisjr.com/ this topic hits home. this topic frustrates me because unfortunately, the shortcomings of man have blinded some to truth and have hindered the reputation of the true Christ follower. i’m not a Christian because it’s trendy or because i was raised that way… i am a Christian because first and foremost i believe that Christ is the son of God and that He died on my behalf, gave glory to God to…
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change of plans
i had great expectations for this summer break from work, particularly that we would be called right away with a foster placement and we would have plenty of time to adjust before i returned to work. oh my goodness, i had it all planned out in my mind. well i don’t believe that my hopes stray from the Lord’s plan for us but clearly my timing is off. “as the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts than your thoughts.” (isaiah 55:9) i’m very familiar with this timing thing as i definitely struggle with being impatient. i have this sense of urgency…
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sabbatical
i’m off of work for the summer! due to some overstaffing issues at work, nurses were given an opportunity to take a leave from work this summer…and i took it! i knew that i needed a break to rest and heal my heart. my prayer is that i will be renewed and rested so that i can continue to care wholly for my kiddos when i return. my phone rang the other day from work and it was a call to inform me of a patient passing away. we do that as a courtesy so there is no shock when we walk in for our shift, it’s supposed to allow…
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the kitchen sponge
we all know you’re not supposed to use sponges to do dishes anymore because they soak up all sorts of bacteria and it never goes away. sometimes i feel like a sponge. so saturated with stuff that it’s difficult to empty. my heart soaks up fears, anxieties, other people’s burdens, lies, hurts, etc. i know that God blessed me with an especially tender heart which i give Him all the glory for and serve Him with as i care for families of chronically and terminally ill children. He created me to yearn for loving the orphan. my heart was made to empathize. i’m not great at squeezing it out. i…